Random Acts of Kindness --> Reactions Observed (by week):
November 13-19, 2011
-In English multiple people offered to get other people sitting near them laptops from the cart --> bunch of “oh, thanks”
-Let Marti pass in front of me when leaving a classroom --> big smile and thank you
-Sister brought me and my other sister a snack since she didn’t have any homework to do --> a joking “okay…what do you want?”
-You saw me sitting in the library alone and asked me if I was okay, then later saw you ask Dionne if she was alright too --> really appreciated that
-Raichel took everyone’s Chinese sheet up to the teacher for them --> small “thanks”
-Dewey let me pass first when leaving a classroom
-Raichel (a newly licensed driver) told me that she tries to let one person pass in front of her everyday
-Saw a bunch of random people hold open the door for someone behind them in the mornings (multiple times each morning)
-Kids were trying to cross the street to get to school in the morning and when they were half way across a car sped up instead of slowing down in order to get through before they passed --> one of the students had to stop abruptly and gave a weird look to her friend as if to say "well that was rude and dangerous"!
-Kids were trying to cross the street to get to school in the morning and when they were half way across a car sped up instead of slowing down in order to get through before they passed --> one of the students had to stop abruptly and gave a weird look to her friend as if to say "well that was rude and dangerous"!
November 20-26, 2011
-I literally saw a chain of people going to church holding the door open for the next person - it never shut!
-A man on the subway gave up his seat for an elderly woman --> nice smile and thank you
-Payal, Raichel, and I gave money to a musician on the street --> got an appreciative nod
-A guy was just feeding the swans for no reason
-At Occupy Boston
**At Occupy Boston
-I picked up Raichel’s pencil --> small “thanks”
-Emma offers me a ride home
-Someone holds the door open for someone else --> huge smile
-Can ALWAYS count on a compliment from Josh Owens and Nickie Chueng basically EVERYDAY to basically EVERYONE! --> everyone’s always wicked appreciative, you can tell it makes them feel good
-Another car stopped to let us pull out of a driveway first
-Guy held open the door for us at the movies
-Leaving the movies, someone let the door swing back, almost hitting Raichel's face --> Raichel jokingly yelled "ow" and laughed and the person who didn't hold open the door turned around and said something like, "oh my god, I'm so sorry! I didn't even see you!"
-Leaving the movies, someone let the door swing back, almost hitting Raichel's face --> Raichel jokingly yelled "ow" and laughed and the person who didn't hold open the door turned around and said something like, "oh my god, I'm so sorry! I didn't even see you!"
-Someone let me cut in line at Dunkin Donuts because they saw that I was in a rush
-The people I babysit for always order pizza for the kids and me, but this time the kids had already eaten, but they ordered one anyways in case I hadn’t eaten before
November 27 – December 3, 2011
-Someone held the door open for me and another person at church
-Lin (our Chinese exchange student) got little goodbye gifts for everyone --> crying (mostly because of the goodbye part though)
-The person I work in the church nursery with always lets me leave early
-Another car let us pass first --> my mom goes “hmm, I guess there are still a few nice people left”
-Ms. Trahan always picks up people’s trash outside --> no one appreciates it though!
-My parents planted my new license plate in one of my textbooks to surprise me
-At a cappella Ben always gets chairs for everyone
-A ton more door holding in the mornings before school
-Guy holds open the door for a teacher carrying a ton of stuff --> sincere “thank you”
-In Chinese everyone started giving everyone compliments!! It started with one, and then that person gave one back, and then realized another thing they liked on someone else, and another, and it just kept spreading, until as a joke everyone was just shouting compliments out at everyone else, like “I like your smile!” “Well I like your whole face!” “Well I love your face!” and so on… It was pretty cute. --> it spread!
-Nick Kerwin starts holding the door open for EVERYONE, EVERY MORNING --> people seem to appreciate it more since he’s actually just standing outside to hold it open for everyone not just whoever’s walking behind him
-I held the door open for a woman with a walker --> she actually didn’t do anything….
-After starting gender studies in AP US all the guys make it a point to hold open the door for the girls (mostly to be obnoxious haha)
-SOO many compliments from everyone for my new hair cut --> actually appreciated it SO much because I was unsure what people would think since it was pretty drastic (huge confidence boost that day! compliments go a long way!)
-The sub got Seth a chair for the computer
-Chris offered to pass out papers for Ms. Xu in Chinese --> big “xie xie!” (thank you!)
-My mom made hot chocolate for me at 5 in the morning on the morning of my road test
-For the order of who would take the test first, there was one kid who was last but was in a rush to get somewhere after, but no one ever offered to switch with him (including me...yikes)
-For the order of who would take the test first, there was one kid who was last but was in a rush to get somewhere after, but no one ever offered to switch with him (including me...yikes)
December 4-10, 2011
-At church some random person just gave me this huge smile --> it’s amazing how much something as simple as a smile can do, just makes you feel welcome!
-Let me pass first at an intersection
-A bunch of people go to Amnesty’s “Write for Rights” thing; people really do care and want to make a difference!
-Solomon holds door open for people in English --> bunch of thank yous
-EVERYDAY Nick Kerwin offers to put the books back for EVERYONE in English
-Friends surprise me by coming to YUGA’s first meeting just to support me --> gave them hugs! glad that they were supporting me with out me saying anything
-Decided to take up Raichel’s “let one person pass in front of me a day” thing
-Sam picked up my pencil for me
-Someone held the door open for someone for the library --> they hesitated, but then held open the door for the next person!
-Every morning people in the gym foyer open the door for people coming in through the back since the doors are always locked (someone different everyday)
-Two people let us keep the change for Hope in Bloom when selling cards for photography club
December 11-17, 2011
-Kindness starts a young age! This little girl tried giving a toy to one of the crying babies, the baby took it and threw it in its fit, so then the girl picked it up and tried giving it to me!
-Person let me and another person pass first at an intersection
-Car slowed to let me and my sister cross the street to get to school
-Lina picked up Caroline’s clip that fell
-You said “bless you” to both me and Sam Alves in Love --> I realized that I hadn’t been recording saying “bless you” as a RAK and panicked! haha
-Bus driver lets a group of kids cross the street first --> the kids didn’t even give an appreciative wave! they just had a sense of entitlement!
-Lydia
-Sam and Lindsay both came into English late and were the only ones without a book --> Lindsay went up and got one first, but only for herself, and upon returning Sam goes, "you couldn't have gotten me one too??"
-Sam and Lindsay both came into English late and were the only ones without a book --> Lindsay went up and got one first, but only for herself, and upon returning Sam goes, "you couldn't have gotten me one too??"
-Spencer got me a really thoughtful and random early Christmas gift even though I didn’t get him anything! --> huge hug! the thought really does count!
-Woman jogging runs into the middle of the street to move a branch off the road
-Woman gave up seat so my friends and I could all sit together at an improv show
-The people I babysit for gave me a surprise Christmas gift --> big thanks at the time and thank you note later
December 18-24, 2011
-Because people stop to let me cross the street every morning, I let these other kids cross the street (kindness does spread! reciprocity!) --> appreciative wave
-Matt goes around and gives every person a compliment at a cappella --> everyone feels good!
-Nickie helps me get gas for the first time
-Raichel sends me a “secret snowman” candy cane just for fun
-Someone flashed their lights at me to warn me of a cop ahead
-You give everyone candy canes after our AP US test
-Nick Kerwin took down all the chairs in English first period --> Mr. Sanford seemed to really appreciate it, nice thank you
-Josh's pencil rolled off his desk in Bio into the aisle and someone else could have easily reached it and picked it up for him but they didn't and instead he just struggled to reach it for a solid two minutes
-Josh's pencil rolled off his desk in Bio into the aisle and someone else could have easily reached it and picked it up for him but they didn't and instead he just struggled to reach it for a solid two minutes
-Seth dropped a Tupperware of strawberries on the ground and a bunch of people helped him clean it up
-My little cousin kept picking up toys and bringing them to different people
-Saw a ton of people giving to Salvation Army
December 25-31, 2011
-When my aunt found out I didn’t get a GPS for Christmas she just gave me one she had never used --> huge hug and big thanks
-Jacqui didn’t charge me at McDonald’s when she was working the cash register
-I brought Raichel a milkshake (which I ended up getting for free because of Jacqui!) since she had just gotten her wisdom teeth removed --> yelled in pain at trying to smile!
-Guy at the mall holds the door open for like a million people
-Girl at the gym lets this other girl have the last treadmill --> they fought over how the other person should take the treadmill for a while, and then finally one of them gave in, and seemed very appreciative
-Someone let me turn first at an intersection
-Raichel let’s a huge group of kids cross before she parked
-The ticket collector on the train didn’t have change for us so he let us ride free
-A girl on the train dropped some papers and two people helped her pick them up
-A guy bought a homeless guy a sandwich! --> “thanks, man, god bless ya” CUTEST THING EVER.
-When there weren’t any squirt bottles left at the gym for wiping off the machines, I saw a ton of people offering to share them with others
-Waitress at Olive Garden just knew our order and brought it over without us even saying anything! --> big tip! haha
-Payal dropped her wallet and a little girl brought it over to her --> HUGE thank you
-All MBTA things are free and AAA will pick you and your car up from any location on New Year’s Eve to lower drunk driving accidents --> I just think it’s great when companies are responsible like that- they don’t have to do anything about it, but they choose to anyways! they were loosing money, but saving lives essentially!
-Just walking down the street random strangers were just saying “Happy New Year” to everyone --> genuine smiles all around
-Man gives us directions when he notices were having trouble trying to figure out where to go
-A bunch of people as well as my friends and I gave spare change to a few people on the street --> all of which were extremely appreciative; each one of us only gave a little, but with everyone giving a little, it seemed to be adding up- we all got a sincere “happy new year”
-People offer to take a picture for us
January 1-7, 2012
-The woman who coordinates everything for the nursery doesn’t care that I was late to work and later sends me a nice email about what a great job I’ve been doing (so underserved!)
-Raichel offers to pick me up and drive me across town so that I can get my car
-Guy at Qdoba gives Raichel a free drink
-Brett calls me and wakes me up at two in the morning for a meteor shower because he knew I’d be interested
-Vani offers everyone gum --> when everyone realizes that they took all her gum they all try to give it back!
-Sister bakes a cake for her friends birthday the next day at school
-Someone’s glove fell out of their pocket in the hallway and someone way behind them (since multiple people saw it and didn’t pick it up) got it and ran up to give it back to them
-Emery gets English books for a ton of people sitting around her
-Erica asked everyone at the table if they had any trash that she could throw out for them
-Laura’s pencil case falls and basically explodes and maybe five people helped her pick stuff up --> it seemed like she didn’t expect people to help, so she had a huge smile on her face
-Raichel’s mom brought us popcorn randomly
-At McDonald’s the drive through person said there was no more ice cream since they turned the machine off, but when we went to pay this other guy gave us an ice cream saying that he had made it for himself right before they shut it off! --> Payal gave him a high five from the back seat!
January 8-14, 2012
-Dad offered to proof read my AP US essay
-Saw a girl pick up a piece of trash in the parking lot and throw it out
-Ilana got me a desk when mine was moved in math
-Someone let me take a left turn before they went since there were a ton of cars behind them --> appreciative little wave
-Bryan
-At this genocide in Darfur meeting a bunch of people donated to help!
-At Mandarin Taste they gave Allison an extra order of scallion pancakes since she ordered so many for all the chorus members
-During our a cappella concert Matt and Josh gave special recognition to me since I was the only one not in chorus and said how they were glad I did it --> on stage I was so nervous since I always freak out about singing in front of people and that just helped calm me down so much; I really appreciated it
-Someone held open the door for someone with a lot of camera equipment for the TV/Media room --> big thank you!
-A teacher was trying to push a cart through the hallway, but kids were too busy trying to get to their next class and kept getting in the way as if they didn't even notice the teacher trying to get through --> teacher seemed frustrated
-A teacher was trying to push a cart through the hallway, but kids were too busy trying to get to their next class and kept getting in the way as if they didn't even notice the teacher trying to get through --> teacher seemed frustrated
-Raichel offered to drive me to lacrosse because she knew I was going broke and low on gas!
-After our lacrosse game, a girl from the other team came up to us and apologized for all her illegal checks --> we stopped talking about how obnoxious their team was right away!
Being more observant of these random acts of kindness really did make me feel more optimistic about things; people are genuinely nice, Sharon High School students really aren’t that terrible, and neither is our generation as a whole I concluded. People actually really appreciate the little things like holding open the door or giving them a small compliment- which definitely gave me more incentive to make it a point to do those little things. Just doing the easy act of simply picking up someone’s pencil is met by a warm smile and sincere thank you, and from observing that I am starting to believe that “love actually is all around us”. It’s those tiny, unexpected, unnecessary acts that would remind people that if they would just pay attention.
Back to the dropped pencil example; it’s not like the person who dropped it is incapable of picking it up, and also the other person who picks it up was not caused any discomfort by witnessing someone else drop their pencil, so picking it up does not benefit them at all. The act is also completely unnecessary; no one asked them to pick it up or pressured them to, yet they still take the time and energy (although not much) to pick it up for the other person, and they do it gladly. Why is that? Because they’re a good person. Has basically everyone at one point or another picked up something for another person? Probably… making everyone a good person. And if everyone’s a good person? Then love must actually be all around us!
What might explain this a tiny bit better is that technically I lied; the person who picked up the pencil is benefiting in a way. They get that friendly “thanks!” or that appreciative smile that makes them feel good because they’ve made someone else feel good. And for that reason, I say that selfishness can be good, because is there really selflessness?? If everybody wins, I’m not really sure that there is. Being a strong believer in egoism, I think that people help others for that “good feeling” they get from it. Their desire to help is real, they want to put that other person’s needs first, but in the end it’s because they also gain something.
Most people I witnessed committing a random act of kindness were repeat offenders. Most people made it into my RAK journal multiple times, some almost everyday! These people are the altruists (or the closest a person can get to being an altruist, since I’m not sure I fully believe in the term). They are almost always thinking of others first. I’m sure that some of the random acts of kindness I observed were just being polite (which isn’t so bad, that basically means they have respect for that person), but I honestly believe that most of them were because they really wanted to- because they care. That is not to say that people who didn’t make it in are selfish though. Things like the bystander effect create hesitation to help people sometimes, and other times people are just unaware of an opportunity to help. I don’t think anyone purposely didn’t help someone else, but due to a variety of different factors, they just ended up not. Doing projects like this though really make you take notice, not just of the people performing the random acts of kindness, but also of the people that could use a random act of kindness, the times where you could lend a helping hand. From recording all these, I noticed my own random acts of kindness increasing because I was becoming more mindful. Before I would hold the door open if I knew someone was close behind me, now I check to see if anyone’s behind me and make sure I hold open the door for them- just little things like that. There’s no more not realizing there’s someone coming in behind me, or thinking “they’re too far away, it will be awkward if I hold open the door for that long”; when you take notice, it actually makes a difference.
The random act of kindness that left the biggest impression on me by far was the guy giving the homeless man a sandwich. We were just walking down the street, and ahead I see a homeless man sitting on the sidewalk. Immediately I start to feel a little uncomfortable as I just always don’t know what to do when I pass them- I just am so good at making things awkward. I notice that a man holding two Subway bags is walking directly towards him- not past him, towards him- so obviously I was intrigued. He just walks right up to him and says something like “hey, how are you?- I hope you don’t mind, but I picked you up some lunch”. He talked really fast; it was obvious that he was uncomfortable too. The man just smiles and goes “thanks, man, god bless ya”, and I literally melted- it was just such a nice moment. At that point I was past them, and didn’t want to awkwardly turn around to watch them, but I think they shook hands. I just got like butterflies in my stomach- it was one of the nicest things I have ever witnessed. THAT just proves that “love is actually all around”- I just think that our issue is that we’re afraid to show it. Things like the bystander effect and your own tiny comfort zone should not restrict a person; that man was obviously nervous, but he did it anyways, and the man was truly grateful for just that small gesture. He didn’t end world hunger, or give him a place to stay, or anything crazy like that- he just brought him a sandwich, which is something that everyone is capable of doing.
Grade: A) Thanks for a great semester. See you in AP!
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